I feel lost.

Hi!
I talked about this on a different site but think this is a better place for me as I got talkin to a few gay travellers offline about this too and one of the things they suggested was if i join the site as it might help.

I am a guy. I like in a small town in Cork. I always knew that I wasn't a normal child! My father was very abusive to me to me as a child. I have always gotten on well with my mother though. In primary school people use always tell me that I was gay and a f*g. I didn't even understand what they were talking about. When I was in 6th class all the lads in my class were talking about girls but I wasn't. When I was in 1st year I was really badly bullied in and outside of school. Bit because i didnt go to youth reach a bit for being a little dfferrent.

Then in second year I finally realised that I was gay. It hit me really hard. I didn't want to be. I went through 3rd year okay! The thing is that I don't want to be this way. I hate who I am. I dont really have any friends. The thing also is if I every decided to come out to my parents I don't think they would really understand. My mother would be really upset. She would be worried that I would catch something. My father wouldn't like it at all his opinion to gay men is that its wrong. He thinks that it should be beat out of them.

Hey

u done well to join up here m8.

U are gonna have to keep on bein brave mister!

U say u hate being gay, thats a normal thing to feel when u first relaise and most gay ppl struggle with it on and off in my opinion.

But, u know, its only cos of society saying its wrong. If society said it was great, the best, fantastic, would u still hate to be gay? i doubt it. so if this is the case, u need to learn to not give a fuk about wot society tells u is good or bad or acceptable. U dont have to shout yer sexuality from the rooftops, i dont. But if u can get it rite in yer mind that its only society that has taught u it is wrong n bad to be gay, u will be freed in yer own mind, to let u get on and enjoy being gay, even if its only u that knows. why give a shit about wot society thinks of being gay? Society is mainly made up of a mass of morons. Their view is not important. Wots important is yer self, then yer family, friends and loved ones. and those, u can deal with one by one. If u got yer mum and dad against gay ppl, thats only at the moment. miracles happen. especially if they knew that their own son was gay. When i told me mum, she said what am i gonna tell the family when they ask how u r? Me dad wrote me a letter sayin he loved me, but be careful of getting Aids. Now they r both cool with it. Am i out to me grandparents? NO! Are they interested in wot my cock likes, i doubt it ha ha so i dont tell em

Take it all at yer own time and pace. IT is your business, no one elses.

I only told me family as I met a fella who became me boyf, and had to share that fact with me folks, as i loved em too much not to tell them.

Glad u joined, keep postin fella